Tag Archives: motherhood

Yet another reason to have a dog.

Last night was rough.

We’ve moved into the new house, but Little Man can’t stay there during the day because, until yesterday, the paint was still wet and all of our worldly possessions are stacked in the middle of each room. So, every day we drop him off at our nanny’s house and pick him up at day’s end. All fine, except our nanny lives an hour away, sometimes more as traffic during rush hour is always going with you.

So, last night I left work at 4:45, got to her house at 5:20 (amazing time), packed him up and set off again at 5:45. He hates the car seat now so he goes stiff as a board when you try to put him in it and starts screaming. Last night he alternated screaming and whining for an hour in the car. I was so frazzled when we got home; I called Mike to vent but just ended up being nasty to him out of frustration (he was at the old house trying to empty the fridge).

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You know you’re a mom when…

Apparently I got old somewhere along the way. I didn’t notice it until it was pointed out to me by my coworker that keeps saying things like, “Wow, I was the youngest person on Jury Duty. Everyone else was old – I think the next eldest person was in their 30s.”

It bugged me to start with, but now I’ve decided to embrace it. So, in the spirit of getting older I feel I am allowed to start using parent terms without incrimination. I will start saying “wireless” meaning radio not cell phones and I will point out the ridiculous youth of today.

Prime example: What the hell is up with models these days? Check out the girl in the center from ShopBop.com:

Model posing, youth of today

This dress is like so heavy

What’s up with her? Is she so skinny she can’t hold herself up? Or is she just sick of modeling? Either way, I don’t want to spend $348.00 to wear this clearly heavy dress. Do you think it’s made of pink lacy chain mail? Can you imagine yourself like this at a party? I would think people would get awfully tired of me sighing. And I would spill my drink all over the carpet while shrugging off questions like, “Why are you standing like that?” and “Are you suffering from polio?”

You know you’re a mom when you want to tell high earning models to stand up straight.

Childless Friends

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

I have some friends that have no interest in having children now or in the future. No problem say I – we can still be friends. But can we?

Turns out it’s not as easy to remain friends when you have such a huge difference between you. On the surface, this just means that you don’t talk to each other about children, you just go out to dinner and act out your old life, prechild right? Sure. It’s possible to not talk about the one thing that occupies 50% of your brain at any given moment, the thing that keeps you awake at night, the things that runs your schedule. At least for a couple hours. Except, you have to get a babysitter to go out. So, scheduling that dinner is not as easy as it used to be. But they’re understanding right?

Well… not as much as you might have thought. One friend told me when I was pregnant he was quite sure I wasn’t going to be “one of those people that posted about my baby on Facebook.” This was a relief to him. Apparently the info I share on Facebook should pertain to the mass audience. So, I made a “no baby updates group” on Facebook, but it rubbed me the wrong way that he wouldn’t want to know about this part of my life.

After I had Little Man, I was surprised at the lack of interest of another friend. First time we ran into him at an event, he didn’t mention the child strapped via
Baby Bjorn to my front. Acted like he wasn’t even there. In the last four months that same friend has continued his strange comments and lack of regard for our child. Today he referred to my son as an “expelled parasite.”

I know that folks that choose to not have children hear a lot of complaints from friends and family hoping to persuade them, which is annoying. If you don’t want children, don’t have ’em. Having children is like getting a tattoo on your face – you’ll never be able to go back so you’d better be committed. I have learned that you should never tell someone how to raise their child, your opinion on having a child when they don’t ask for my opinion, or that they shouldn’t have cut their hair off once it’s done. But on the flip side, if you aren’t having kids,
try to think of the most important thing in your life – something that relies entirely on you for survival – your dog, your business, your hamster, whatever. Multiply your thoughts and feelings, fears and hopes for this thing by a million and that’s close to how a parent feels about their child. It’s a completely unconditional love, the strongest feeling you will ever experience. I would give
up my life for my child.

When my husband and I were planning to get pregnant we would talk a lot about how our child wouldn’t rule our life. We vowed that we would stay close with friends that had no children now or in their hopeful future. We never considered the fact that those friends may not be having the same
conversation.