Tag Archives: breast feeding

Know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em

Parenthood

I watched Parenthood last night. I’m really starting to like that show. Weird, how your tastes change to fit your lifestyle (I also read Redbook now, not Glamour anymore!). The characters on there are each coming to terms with their own struggles and as one sister fights to keep her teenage daughter close, her brother loses his job and finds out his wife is pregnant on the same day.

Know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em.
Sometimes as you go through life, while you struggle to be in control, you simply cannot. At these times, you have to let go and watch where life takes you.

My son turned six months today, I am starting my own business and we’re looking at buying a house that may be the tightest of stretches for us. All of this added together with the day to day life of a new family and the hormones of a new mother is too much for me to handle. This week, I’m folding, I’ll lean back and watch. Some of the chips will land where they will and as they do, the path will clear for me to control the others.

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You know you’re a mom when…

Apparently I got old somewhere along the way. I didn’t notice it until it was pointed out to me by my coworker that keeps saying things like, “Wow, I was the youngest person on Jury Duty. Everyone else was old – I think the next eldest person was in their 30s.”

It bugged me to start with, but now I’ve decided to embrace it. So, in the spirit of getting older I feel I am allowed to start using parent terms without incrimination. I will start saying “wireless” meaning radio not cell phones and I will point out the ridiculous youth of today.

Prime example: What the hell is up with models these days? Check out the girl in the center from ShopBop.com:

Model posing, youth of today

This dress is like so heavy

What’s up with her? Is she so skinny she can’t hold herself up? Or is she just sick of modeling? Either way, I don’t want to spend $348.00 to wear this clearly heavy dress. Do you think it’s made of pink lacy chain mail? Can you imagine yourself like this at a party? I would think people would get awfully tired of me sighing. And I would spill my drink all over the carpet while shrugging off questions like, “Why are you standing like that?” and “Are you suffering from polio?”

You know you’re a mom when you want to tell high earning models to stand up straight.

Childless Friends

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

I have some friends that have no interest in having children now or in the future. No problem say I – we can still be friends. But can we?

Turns out it’s not as easy to remain friends when you have such a huge difference between you. On the surface, this just means that you don’t talk to each other about children, you just go out to dinner and act out your old life, prechild right? Sure. It’s possible to not talk about the one thing that occupies 50% of your brain at any given moment, the thing that keeps you awake at night, the things that runs your schedule. At least for a couple hours. Except, you have to get a babysitter to go out. So, scheduling that dinner is not as easy as it used to be. But they’re understanding right?

Well… not as much as you might have thought. One friend told me when I was pregnant he was quite sure I wasn’t going to be “one of those people that posted about my baby on Facebook.” This was a relief to him. Apparently the info I share on Facebook should pertain to the mass audience. So, I made a “no baby updates group” on Facebook, but it rubbed me the wrong way that he wouldn’t want to know about this part of my life.

After I had Little Man, I was surprised at the lack of interest of another friend. First time we ran into him at an event, he didn’t mention the child strapped via
Baby Bjorn to my front. Acted like he wasn’t even there. In the last four months that same friend has continued his strange comments and lack of regard for our child. Today he referred to my son as an “expelled parasite.”

I know that folks that choose to not have children hear a lot of complaints from friends and family hoping to persuade them, which is annoying. If you don’t want children, don’t have ’em. Having children is like getting a tattoo on your face – you’ll never be able to go back so you’d better be committed. I have learned that you should never tell someone how to raise their child, your opinion on having a child when they don’t ask for my opinion, or that they shouldn’t have cut their hair off once it’s done. But on the flip side, if you aren’t having kids,
try to think of the most important thing in your life – something that relies entirely on you for survival – your dog, your business, your hamster, whatever. Multiply your thoughts and feelings, fears and hopes for this thing by a million and that’s close to how a parent feels about their child. It’s a completely unconditional love, the strongest feeling you will ever experience. I would give
up my life for my child.

When my husband and I were planning to get pregnant we would talk a lot about how our child wouldn’t rule our life. We vowed that we would stay close with friends that had no children now or in their hopeful future. We never considered the fact that those friends may not be having the same
conversation.

 

Sophie’s home

We decided not to involve the cops in the Sophie the Giraffe kidnapping, and instead paid the $18.99 (plus shipping and handling) to Amazon.com. Five to seven days later, Sophie arrived home. Praise be to God!

Strangely, she’s cleaner than when she left. There were no remnants of last week’s oatmeal crusted on to any of her legs, let alone all of them and it made me wonder if she didn’t set this all up just to get a little R&R. No matter, she’s home now, Little Man is lovingly mouthing her nose as we speak.

Back at work after maternity leave

It’s weird to be back, but I’ll say this – it’s a lot easier than being at home and rushing around all day. I can eat whenever I want, pee whenever I want. Only thing was I cannot do is see my boy whenever I want and that sucks.

The thing I thought would be most difficult was picking up the work and getting into the groove, but I was wrong. That was surprisingly easy. I went through my emails and found what still needed to be done, started approving things immediately and felt right as rain. The hardest part was leaving the house. Waking up at 6, feeding JT, changing JT, pumping, getting hair  and makeup done, packing a lunch, eating breakfast, dressing and now I’m late for work! I got home at 6 and put my son to bed at 8, so he got to see me for 2 hours. That sucks!!

Nine months of yuck followed by 18 hours of hell for 2 hours a day!

 

It’s 5 o’clock in the morning. I’m so sick of yawning

5 am and the fourth feeding of the night is complete. the boy is sleeping soundly, the dog has completely reverted to wild times and is running full boar around the garden barking intermittently and I am wondering why I didn’t join the realms of idiots that hit black Friday shopping this morning. After all, I’m awake.

My days now consist of feeding, clothing and keeping my little boy happy with short bursts of him sleeping when I run around like a lunatic doing laundry, folding laundry, pumping, dressing myself, eating (it took me 2 hours to eat half a bagel yesterday) and packing the diaper bag, the pump and anything else we might need to go to the grocery store! It takes at least half an hour to leave the house at any given time (second excursion was about 20 minutes away, I got fifteen minutes out with JT screaming from 5 minutes out when I realized I should pull over and try a bottle – for him not me, although…  – only to find I forgot the bottles and had to drive home again. By the time we got home he was sleeping soundly).

Last week… maybe. Symptoms

So, despite the major confusion over the actual due date (could be the 12th, the 14th or the 19th depending which doctor you ask), I thought it would be good to mention some of the things that happen towards the end. Maybe these things are just me, maybe they happen to all.
1. The baby drops.
I know this doesn’t happen to all. I guess second time mothers don’t always have the drop until birth. For me it happened last week. I didn’t feel it but the doctor told me, and people noticed that my belly actually looks like it’s going to collapse over rather than hanging in suspense.

2. Your boobs leak.
This started about three weeks ago. Nothing major and more out of one than the other, but tiny drops appeared when I was washing. Supposedly you aren’t supposed to partake in nipple play because it can induce you (my sis-in-law’s doctor told her), but anything that might induce is for me!

3. Feet and hands swell.
Not just after you walk either. Pretty much all the time. It’s not really noticeable all the time, but try making a fist and you’ll notice.

4. Changes downstairs.
Constant leaking. Not like water breaking just enough to make you uncomfortable and want to shower twice a day. Try panty liners. And also, you have to go number 2 after everything you eat. It’s not diarrhea but it’s kind of like the beginning of a stomach bug where you wonder if it’s gonna get worse.

5. Your bones ache
For me, when he dropped, I could feel his weight on my pelvis when I lay down. I have to turn over throughout the night as my hips and pelvis start to hurt. Sometimes my ribs too.

6. You can’t keep up
I can’t walk more than a mile now. My feet and hands swell like crazy, including the bottom of my feet and my body will ache and this pain will go on for 2 days. Not worth it!

7. Contractions
I have little contractions every now and then. Nothing regular of course. They feel like the muscles in your tummy squeeze up tight and the baby is really tight in there. It feels kind of like a period cramp or gas pains.

There are plenty of other symptoms of labor, but I haven’t had any others yet. For more symptoms, check this link:

http://www.pregnancyetc.com/signs_of_labor.htm