I saw a friend of mine this weekend. She had a baby three months ago. This baby was an oops – she had moved away from her boyfriend several months before (they were together for many years), but had come back for a visit. They were considering getting back together when she found out she was expecting. From what she told us, her friends, she had never wanted children.
Her little boy is now three months old and she threw a three-month old “birthday” party for him over the weekend. Her house is covered in photos of the baby, everybody that was invited either had a baby or was expecting and the talk was entirely about babies. Being connected to a baby in your belly is not the same. From someone who has yet to see the toes and fingers of my baby, I can tell you that for sure. I’m petrified of losing this baby, but it’s still a thing. Yes, a thing I talk to, but still a thing, a glimpse of what might be, but not actually the real thing. I dream about holding it and what that will feel like deep inside me, but I have no idea.
People change. No matter how much my husband and I say we’ll still be the same people, that we won’t become obsessed, I realize now that’s not going to happen. Not only is there no way to avoid it, but I don’t think we’ll want to.
If you don’t believe me, read this and you will: http://www.breastfeeding.com/reading_room/change_your_life.html